“Home” Fiction. Based on a True Lack of Belonging.

“When I think about home, I think about returning to dust… returning to the soil.” -Nahko Bear

“Home”

Fiction. Based on a True Lack of Belonging.

By Nikki Wicz

This journal entry is inspired by true events. Some of the characters, names, businesses, incidents, and certain locations and events have been fictionalized for dramatic purposes. Any similarity to the name, character or history of any person is entirely coincidental and unintentional.

Trigger Warning: our program often motivates people to discuss their trauma. If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, please, take a step back to address emotional flashbacks and trauma before continuing to push yourself. If you are experiencing a medical emergency, call 911 or the National Suicide Hotline at (1-800) 273-8255

I want to go home,
I think as I lay
In bed.

Maybe I’m an alien,
Longing for a place I’ve
Long forgotten.

I’m lost, light-years away
In a hateful world,
Dejected at the thought

Of working forty hours
A week for the rest of my life
To keep on breathing

Even if I imagine
Things would be better
If I weren’t.

Maybe I’m a forest
Nymph, who belongs
Inside a tree with bugs

And vines creeping over
My skin, rather than the eyes
Of old men.

Maybe I’m a mermaid,
Who’s meant to ride waves
Rather than drown in misery

At the thought of being
Persecuted by a government
That values my uterus

More than me. Because
I can reproduce schools
Of fish to be brainwashed

When I’d much rather
Be reading a book, and
Birthing ideas.

Finding a place to call
My own between the lines
Of comedy and tragedy.

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